Now that we're collectively in a bargaining phase of grief, two things can simultaneously be true:

1) someone can hurt you and shouldn’t be trusted again
2) they, like all humans, carry trauma and deserve compassion

The lesson here IMO is learning how to protect oneself without closing your heart and losing your tenderness

friendly neighborhood shitcaster / building @pinetree

Totally agree. "Hate the sin, not the sinner."

When the issues are pathological, you'll have to draw hard boundaries. 

But it doesn't mean you don't feel for the person.

something that has been captivating for me about your relationship with this whole thing is how much anger (?) i perceive coming from you. maybe it’s not anger though. what is it? how are you feeling towards alex at this point? what is the outcome that would bring peace to you?

It is anger, shock, and sadness.

I am shocked that someone who could have ended up with consequences far worse would have the audacity to return.

I am angry that now another team was lied to and has to go through what we did, an incredibly traumatic experience.

I'm heartbroken he clearly learned nothing.