Wellness

please, how do i fix low self esteem?

having an epiphany i am my biggest critic and it's killing me that i can't even accept compliments, my immediate reaction is to deny and move on

Design and software at Apple. Also into AI, philosophy of mind, ethics.

building reel.farm and farcasterstudio.com

Oh, something @sam said above triggered a thought for me, around the conscious act "accepting the compliment."  

There's an evolutionary quirk that has us prioritise negative things to positive things (which makes sense, the neg thing gonna kill ya, so pay attention).

I forget the numbers, but it's like 20...

🐵 ← 🙈🙉🙊 → /phil →  phil.cockfield.net, db.team →  
ƒ(🌳) →  🧫 /sys  ←  @cell <T>

...you hack the loop, and ingrain the positive message in the thought system, override the negative signal, which is default stronger.

The thing I found useful about this insight, is that it's not "YOU you" that's the problem here. You're being "normal human".  It's the (🧠)...& the API surface has easy cheat codes.

...20 compliments and 1 negative statement just wipes out any good feelings you may have.  Instantly - it's just the algorithm doing it's work.

So the hack is when you get the compliment, (and this will feel so "put on") you sit with it, you hold it in mind, replaying it, for like 30s or a minute.