Michael pfp
Michael
@michael
100 days ago my first child was born. I'm far from an expert on child rearing but here's the advice I wish I had 100 days ago:
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Michael pfp
Michael
@michael
Sleep - Dividing the night into 4 hour watches worked great for us. If you're on watch, any baby care goes to you. If you aren't then get some rest. There's no value in having both of you sleep deprived if you can avoid it
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Michael pfp
Michael
@michael
(sleep ctd) - Don't rush in every time they make a peep. Sometimes they can make noises and even open their eyes while sleeping. Give them 30s to settle (scaling up with age) before checking in or you may wake them up accidentally - It's your job to train them how to sleep, don't let them train you instead
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Michael pfp
Michael
@michael
Stuff - Buy less stuff. Most of the things we bought we haven't used enough to justify the price. Here are the few we have: - Clothes are easy to gift so you'll probably get a bunch of them. And at this stage they grow so quickly that they won't wear anything more than a few times anyway. Buy the minimum & do laundry
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Michael pfp
Michael
@michael
(Stuff ctd) - Sleep carriers are a great, especially if you live in a two story/otherwise spread out house - Swaddles are amazing but what works for one child won't work for another, buy 1-2 of a few varieties and experiment - Find a good nursing pillow, they're worth splurging on
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Michael pfp
Michael
@michael
(Stuff ctd ctd) - Bassinet: No need to go wild with the Snoo. We inherited a Graco one that rocks on its own that's FANTASTIC and is much cheaper - Strollers: If you live in a big city and walk everywhere, get the fancy one. If you live in suburbia and drive, go smaller & optimize for mobility
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Michael pfp
Michael
@michael
Household - Your normal life chores don't go away when you have a kid. If anything they grow more complex and you add a ton of new chores with child care. It may feel like you do nothing other than cook/clean/care for the first few weeks. Accept that this is normal and get through it. It gets better.
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Michael pfp
Michael
@michael
Relationships - Your family will probably not help as much as you think they will - Your friends will probably not visit as often as you expect
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Michael pfp
Michael
@michael
(Relationships ctd) - Sleep deprivation + new stressors + medical recovery will probably put a strain on your relationship with your partner. You'll probably be snappier & less tolerant of minor inconveniences. This is normal and you'll get through it. Above all try to be kind to each other.
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Michael pfp
Michael
@michael
Love - A lot of parents bond with their children instantly... but a lot of parents don't. If you're in the second camp don't worry, it will come. It didn't really click for me until the first time he smiled at me. You'll get there.
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