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phil
@phil
Welcome @matt! Matt Bateman is a philosopher & historian of education. He’s a cofounder of Guidepost Montessori, the world’s largest Montessori school network. He has agreed to do an AMA for the /books channel. Reply with your questions (please make sure to tag him so he can easily find them)
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jp 🎩
@jpfraneto.eth
for people that don't have kids, sometimes being told "you should have kids" is offensive unsolicited advice. given the impact that having kids (and relating to them as you have done) has brought to your human experience, and the natural and -projected by me- innate willingness to share that joy with others: how do you deal with the fact that people postpone having kids until they've "achieved something" in their life? what's your relationship to that whole process? long winded and diffuse question. the most important part of the answer is whatever comes to you as the answer. thanks for all the work you've done. they are a gift
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Matt Bateman
@matt
1. Sometimes “should” means “it’s your moral duty” or something which is wrong. Other times it means “it’s much, much better than you think it might be” or “given what I know about you, it’s more worth considering than you seem to realize”. There’s a (very understandable) allergy towards shoulds but on a more charitable read of them this is not necessarily offensive advice. It’s about sharing enthusiasm for how wonderful it can be, which is not always easy to understand.
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Matt Bateman
@matt
2. I definitely don’t think you need to wait until you’ve “achieved something” to have children, except love and marriage. Children are a project, so you need mainly time, but I think people imagine they cost much more or have more prerequisites than they in fact do. I think there are advantages to waiting and also considerable disadvantages. I’m a tired old man wit a 1yo and a 4yo so I experience both :) It’s fine to have children younger or older. I would place more weight on finding the right coparent than the exact timing.
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