i’m consistently surprised by the amount of people that just don’t know how to have a conversation. they don’t pay attention. they don’t try to understand what you really mean, just what they think you should mean. they ask questions out of formality vs. curiosity.

what a sad life to live

seeker /native /believein /bedrock 🇵🇸

i have had this same experience, and i suspect it's a significant contributor to my growing "misanthropy" over the past decade or so.

so many treat irl connection as if they are main characters phoning in a contractually obligated performance in which you are merely a supporting character in their hero's journey.

the only shot at get anything resembling meaningful engagement is to ask them about themselves. Little or no effort to be present otherwise, or to hit the conversational ball back over the net even when you lob it right to them.

i'm an introvert and these kinds of interactions sap my energy to such a degree that avoiding them feels like necessary self-protection.

maybe i'm the problem ... but i also was a working journalist for a number of years, and i got to be pretty good at connecting with lots of different people and asking often open-ended questions to elicit responses.

what you describe — and what i often experience — feels very different: like being ghosted face-to-face, in real time.