If Sony proactively communicated what they wanted to permission on their chain (eg no memecoins), would people have accepted that?

Was the bigger issue that memecoins were allowed to exist and then censored?

Sony has a history of wanting to have its cake and eat it too. By that I mean, they want to control the pipeline to such a degree that they end up disincentivizing people from using their products.
They lost the home video wars because their licensing agreements were too restrictive and took too much of a cut. They lost the format wars a decade later due to the same mentality (remember Minidisc?). While leadership has changed in the last 30 years, Sony's history of trying to both have something thats technically advanced and restrictive have always led to a short lived outcome. Same issue here, just a different wrapper.

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Why did they win the Blu-ray vs. HD-DVD battle? Genuine question - I don't know the answer to this.

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Blu-ray won mainly due to Sony's strategic bundling with PS3 and stronger industry backing. They had Disney, Fox, and other major studios on board, plus higher storage capacity (50GB vs 15GB). This time Sony's restrictive approach worked because they had the ecosystem advantage.