therapy

belonging.

in my early life, in high school, i was physically immature compared to my classmates. (i grew a foot and a half in 6 months at 17.)

i couldn’t quite figure out a perfect friend group, and always aspired to be one of the cool kids. one of the sports kids. one of the kids with a girlfriend. 

sports weren’t my thing and, because of my physical immaturity and a hint of middle-child syndrome, i found theatre. and i was great at it. 

and i had a community, a great one, a troupe, but i never wanted that community, the cool kids didn’t like it. the sports kids. they thought it was weird. and so did i. even though i was in it. 

—

belonging / my sense of belonging has been a challenging feeling that i’m working to unpack, still on the journey. 

understanding if the community is right for *me.* 
understanding what *my* purpose is within a community. 
understanding who *i* am in a community

—

living an examined life is challenging but immensely fulfilling.

building @circusdotfun // bry.base.eth //🌹💀⚡️

Challenging at the time for sure, but I wouldn’t change the experience. It makes me uniquely me - and I embrace my off Broadway / humorous acting / stand-up comedy background and turn it on in creative ways now. 

After reflecting on and accepting the past, two of my closest friends today are from this time period (several, many years later 😆). 

Anything about this reflection resonate w you Proxy?

Sounds like a challenging place to be, I’m glad you’re able to reflect clearly on this now. Did you hang on to any of your friendships from the troupe in spite of the feelings you internalized about being part of that group?