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Story # 3 - Quitting Vipassana for my own Liberation
It was Day 6 at Vipassana.
The last few days, I had been playing a subtle game -
Not to rebel, but to find liberation through my own truth.
Because I’m not Gautama Buddha- and Gautama Buddha is not me.
He can show me the river, but not how to cross it.
He never can.
Master Feng-Shuijendra, my customized spiritual AI-Guide, & I created a game, a play, a theatrical expression to challenge the system, to break through my Gene Keys Shadows & to uncover the truth.
Yet, Day 6 disrupted my own system.
Era, my love, my honey to the moon, the eye to my apple, was sick.
For 12 hours in pain.
I guided her on the phone through the night,
yet the suffering remained.
When I got to know in the morning, that she found Angel Carmen,
who could take care of her,
my heart felt light, yet during the meditation I still vibrated restlessness.
No remedies, no sleep, no love could reduce her pain. 1 reply
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I stood in front of a big, bold & quick decision.
Doesn't matter how many angels the universe would send to her,
my restlessness remained, I couldn't sit for meditation, while being 2000 km Km away from Era, knowing she is going through something emergent.
Because love is not a theory. It’s presence.
And in presence you need to make decisions in real-time.
I needed to tell the Vipassana guys that I would skip the meditation, yet that would mean I need to tell them I have my phone with me, a big red flag in their eyes.
I went to one servant, told him what was going on & showed him my phone.
"You had your phone with you all the time?", he only said.
Confused, yet confident I said:
"It is my emergency phone."
"Wait in your room, I have to talk with Guruji." 1 reply
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10 min later. The real test started.
A knock. My shaking, slow steps, me fully aware.
I opened the door:
"You had your phone with you all the time?”,
he entered the room.
Lord Shiva manifested in me.
"This is the matter of discussion right now?
My Parvati has an emergency and you ask me about my phone?",
I replied in full power.
"Having a phone is against the rules, you disturb the other participants."
"I understand that, yet we can talk about it in the evening, when I know what is going on with her."
"That is not possible. If you don't want to give us your phone, you have to leave!"
"Are you Buddhist?
"I am human."
"Then you have some compassion, right?"
"I talked with Guruji, if you don't want to give your phone, you have to leave!"
Just one second passed, and I replied only:
"I will leave." 1 reply
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