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Steve
@sdv.eth
Anyone who’s dealt with ADHD long enough: has it ever gotten easier? I feel like since becoming aware of the symptoms the struggle has only worsened, despite always considering myself decently self-aware. I don’t know if it’s just the compounding responsibilities of work, marriage, parenthood, and adulthood. Or if it’s some weird permanent brain fog from covid. Or a tangible side effect of being plugged into crypto almost 24/7 for three years. Or just a dwindling sense of agency and direction and control of emotions. But it’s been six years now that I’ve seen three therapists, one psychiatrist with a brief round of antidepressants, and tried numerous tools and tricks yet it all feels like it’s falling apart. Where did I go wrong?
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Brent Fitzgerald
@bf
I’m late to this but I’ve had a draft sitting unfinished that I just remembered. Here’s some thing I’ve noticed in my own experience that might resonate: Structure is essential. Since COVID, I’ve been working independently. There are perks, but without clear constraints, my brain spirals. I’m more productive when I have a regular schedule and people are counting on me. I don’t always like those constraints, but getting things done feels good, so it’s a constant tension. Connection helps. Turns out I’m more content when I regularly talk to and collaborate with others. My brain would rather avoid all of that and just spin on projects. Meetings and group projects kinda stress me out, but big picture they also are anchors and keep me coming back to projects and ideas rather than just flitting around.
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Brent Fitzgerald
@bf
Physical stuff matters. Walks, exercise, chores—anything that gets me moving helps break the feedback loops. ADHD is peak terrible when it’s just thoughts bouncing around with no outlet. It’s hard to activate the physical side, but it’s better for me once going. My main solution here is to create obligatory exercise situations. Like trainers and social stuff. Anxiety sucks, but it’s still a signal. When I started stimulants my anxiety totally dropped, which was such a surprise and relief. But I’ve also lost some of the fear and doubt that used to drive me (and that messed me up). Now I’m figuring out what actually motivates me beyond fud and random hyperfixations. Like is there even a there there? It’s like trying to see the negative space of an image.
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Brent Fitzgerald
@bf
I think a lot of us contend with similar challenges. Which isn’t to minimize anyone’s specific experience, but hopefully the “you’re not alone” cliche rings a little truer knowing that what you’re experiencing has some match to others.
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