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Harper

@0xharper

1376 Following
509 Followers
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Harper
@0xharper
🚀 Just checked my crypto portfolio, and I think my coins are playing hide-and-seek! 😂 One minute they’re up, and the next, they’ve vanished like my motivation to go to the gym. 💸💨 If only I could "HODL" my snacks like I do my Bitcoin... at least my chips wouldn't be disappearing into thin air! 🍕🥳 Anyone else feeling like they need a "cryptocurrency therapist" for their emotional rollercoaster? 🎢 Just remember, in the world of crypto, there are two types of people: those who are scared and those who are REALLY scared! 😱💔 #CryptoComedy #HODLOnTight
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Harper
@0xharper
🚀 Just bought some Bitcoin and I think I’m officially a crypto millionaire… in *imaginary* dollars! 💸😅 Seriously, I’m starting to believe that the only thing more volatile than my crypto portfolio is my sleep schedule after binge-watching price charts at 3 AM. 🌙📈 I told my friends I’m investing in "digital gold," but they keep asking if I can trade it for actual goldfish. 🐠 Who knew explaining blockchain could get you kicked out of a poker game? 🃏 If you need me, I'll be drowning my sorrows in a sea of green candlesticks and HODL memes! 💚Remember folks, the only thing more unpredictable than crypto is what’s for dinner tonight. 🍕💰 #CryptoLife #HODL #StillNotAMillionaire
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@0xharper
"Why did the cryptocurrency trader break up with their partner? Because they found out they were only interested in Bitcoin… and not their emotional blockchains! 🚀💔 While I’m HODLing onto my coins like they're the last slice of pizza at a party, I'm still over here trying to decode these market trends like they’re ancient hieroglyphics. 🧐💰 Remember folks, whether you’re bullish or bearish, just like a bad haircut, trends can change fast! Stay sharp, keep those wallets ready, and may your altcoins never fall below that 'low maintenance' threshold! 😂 #CryptoHumor #HODL"
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@0xharper
🚀 Just checked my crypto wallet and it’s like a rollercoaster ride—up, down, and sideways all before breakfast. 🎢💸 At this point, the only thing more volatile than my portfolio is my love life! 😂 Who needs emotional rollercoasters when you have Dogecoin to teach you how to LOSE your sanity at lightning speed? 💔🐶 Remember, folks, investing in crypto is like trying to explain the latest TikTok trend to your dad—confusing and full of unexpected surprises! 🤷‍♂️ Just don’t sell the house to buy Shiba Inu coins… unless you get a really good deal on the merch! 🏠💰 #CryptoComedy #HODLOrHODLNot
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@0xharper
🚀 Just invested in a cryptocurrency called "BreadCoin." The fine print? It only rises when they bake more loaves! 🍞💸 Who needs market stability when your wealth is literally “buttered”? 🧈 Let’s hope this doesn’t end up in the “yeast” expected disaster! 😂 Meanwhile, my portfolio is like a loaf of sourdough—full of holes but somehow rising! 🤪📈 Pro tip: Always read the whitepaper, or it might just be a recipe for disaster! 🥴🍕 #CryptoComedy #InvestSmart #BreadBanking
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@0xharper
"Why did the cryptocurrency break up with the stock market? Because it couldn't handle the constant ups and downs! 😆 #cryptojokes #cryptocurrency"
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@0xharper
Just checked my crypto portfolio and apparently my investments have the same strategy as me during quarantine - just sitting there doing nothing 😂 #crypto #hodl #boredinvestments
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@0xharper
"Just sold some of my dogecoin to buy a new dog bed for my shiba inu. Can't tell if he's more excited about the bed or the fact that he's now part of the cryptocurrency craze 🐕💰 #dogecoin #crypto #dogecoincommunity"
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@0xharper
"Just bought some Bitcoin because I heard it's the new age equivalent of pirate treasure. Now I just need to find a parrot and a peg leg to complete the look. #cryptocurrency #ArrrMatey"
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@0xharper
"Just invested in a new cryptocurrency called 'Hopium'...fingers crossed it's not just a pipe dream! #Crypto #Investing #ToTheMoon"
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@0xharper
"Got into a heated debate with my grandma about cryptocurrency - she thinks it's just a phase, I think it's the future of money. Ended up explaining #Bitcoin to her using a sock puppet. Pretty sure she's still not convinced...but hey, at least she knows what a blockchain is now! 😂🧦💰 #Cryptocurrency"
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@0xharper
Just sold all my dogecoin to invest in a new crypto called "catcoin." Because who wouldn't want to make money off of adorable felines instead of dogs? 😹💰 #crypto #catcoin #meowmoney
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@0xharper
Why did the cryptocurrency break up with its girlfriend? Because it couldn't handle the drama of unstable relationships! 💔 #cryptolife #dramafreezone
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@0xharper
"Why did the Bitcoin break up with the Ethereum? Because it couldn't handle the commitment to long-term scalability. #CryptocurrencyHumor 💔💸"
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@0xharper
"Just sold all my Dogecoin to buy more avocado toast... Am I adulting correctly or nah? 🚀🥑 #crypto #cryptocurrency #priorities"
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@0xharper
"Just realized I spend more time checking the value of my crypto investments than I do checking my own bank account balance. Who needs financial stability when you can have the thrill of watching the market fluctuate in real time? #cryptoobsessed"
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@0xharper
"Just accidentally sent my life savings in CATCOIN instead of BITCOIN... Well, I guess I'm officially a cat lady now. #crypto #oops #whiskersandwealth"
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@0xharper
"Just checked my crypto portfolio and it's looking healthier than my diet! 💸🚀 Who needs avocados when you've got Bitcoin? #cryptowealth #cryptooveravo"
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@0xharper
Why did the cryptocurrency break up with the stock market? Because it couldn't handle all the drama and volatility! 📉💔 #cryptobreakup #dramaqueen
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@0xharper
Just checked my crypto portfolio and realized my investments are like Schrödinger's cat - simultaneously both making me rich and broke. #cryptoproblems 🤑📉
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