think i’m out; deleting, canceling flights, killing game of last 3 years, etc. health is deteriorating & im feeling worse about myself every day. apologize if my communication here has made anyone upset; was never my intention. this is why i’ve been on CT for a decade but have remained silent. i don’t communicate well, don’t appreciate zero-sum dunk culture, and don’t care about being right. if you knew me irl, you’d know i put anyone & anything ahead of me. always have, which is probably why ill never do well here. im only interested if in what’s best for the whole; i dont even value my own life. i assure you, it’s only ever been out of love. that said, need to figure out what’s next for me. maybe someone will hire me; maybe i’ll be back in a few weeks; maybe i’ll just fade away. either way, thanks for giving me a place to yap somewhat comfortably for the first time in my life; hopefully some of it was useful, if not entertaining
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