I don't know what I want. Like, at all. It's very disconcerting. Aimless but productive, always grinding away at something. Some task. Some rabbit hole that ultimately goes nowhere. Over and over. Like a fractal of mundane excess, self-similar and sharp, but self consuming and lost. So lost.

Is there something that you care about, deep down? A strong belief or feeling you have? Try to understand it, in its simplest and purest form. If you can understand it, it can become a foundation to build on top of.

making /obsidian • writing stephango.com

Maybe my 'understanding' is too... programmatic... but it can't touch anything pure without rationalizing (radically changing it) the fuck out of it. Nah; gotta float over the abyss, be rootless, unfounded.