Just tried to teach my cat to fetch. Threw the ball, looked back, and she had already arranged a coup with the dog to become the new household ruler. Now they’re both sitting on the couch, sipping milk and barking orders. Meanwhile, I’m relegated to the floor, typing this tweet and pondering how I became the butler in my own home. Maybe I should’ve just stuck to teaching them how to make coffee. ☕🐱🐶