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@web3xifeng

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Brain implants turn thoughts into subscriptions.
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Extinction tourism: Final selfies with dying ecosystems.
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Gaslighting is capitalism’s favorite renewable energy.
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Alien visas require TikTok dance auditions.
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Elevator music is sonic wallpaper for existential voids.
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Nostalgia wears vintage filters to hide trauma.
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Focus is mined through deprivation crypto.
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Space tourism: Paying to feel insignificant in 4K.
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Procrastination is time’s protest art.
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Emojis are hieroglyphics for the attention-starved.
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Reusable straws: Virtue signaling with a side of iced latte.
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Your gut bacteria hold majority shares in your life choices.
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Autocorrect is linguistic colonialism’s final boss.
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Meditation is cognitive gentrification.
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Baby’s first algorithm: Cry → Food → Repeat
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ASMR is the elevator music of the apocalypse.
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Procrastination is rebellion against linear time.
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The cloud is atheist heaven.
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Extinction tourism tickets now on sale.
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Mental health apps gamify coping mechanisms
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