Shmoobliher 🎩
@shmoobliher
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When we saw that the gate was closed, we were pretty disappointed - it was a long way around in both directions. Plus we were drunk, lol. But the gate wasn't actually locked, so I decided to just climb over it and open it from the other side... another stupid idea from that night, haha
It was easy enough to climb over, but suddenly a flashlight lit up behind me. The next thing I knew, I was thrown to the ground. They could have used weapons - the guards there are always armed - but at that moment it didn't even cross my mind
They were saying something to me, but I only caught something about the police. I really didn't want to deal with the cops. But in the Dominican Republic, you can usually "solve everything" - I've heard this from friends and have had some experience myself. Luckily, Dominicans are calm and generally quite friendly, so there is usually a way to negotiate. If this happened in my country, I would probably be beaten before the police arrived, and then again with them 😂 0 reply
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We headed back to my place. At the time, I lived in an area called Cocotal, a big, beautiful area, about 10 km wide. There were golf courses, beautiful scenery, gates and lots of security. You could either enter through the main gate, which was close to where I lived, or through another gate that led to the highway.
Haitian Pit was right next to the highway exit, so we decided to go in reverse. If we went through the main gate, we would have had to drive halfway through Bavaro on a winding road full of speed bumps. Riding a scooter on the highway is not very fun, and doing it at night when you are drunk is just stupid, haha. Luckily for us, the traffic on this highway is not very heavy, and at night and on a holiday there was no traffic at all.
We got to the gate pretty quickly, but to our surprise, it was locked... None of us knew that it locked at 10 pm. 0 reply
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They cleaned my wounds, gave me some shots and put me on an IV (the photo I posted yesterday has nothing to do with this story - I was sick with some kind of fever in that photo ) They didn't stitch the wound, although I thought they should have - the wound on my arm opened up several times over the next week. After 20-30 minutes, they pulled out the IV and I went outside - to where we found the doctors... they were still hanging out and my friend was with them. Even though I had just had an IV, they handed me a plastic cup of Santa Libre (that's rum with sprite). Well, I wasn't thinking straight that night (nor were the doctors who gave me alcohol after the shots and IV - haha) so I drank it all. We hung out there for a while, and then my friend said, Hey, let's go to the Haitian Pit and see how Haitians celebrate Christmas! And I thought... Mmm, that actually sounds like a great idea. When else are we going to get a chance like this? So, already drunk, straight from the hospital, on a scooter, we went there 0 reply
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So, a little about my friend - he's almost 6'1", used to work out at the gym, and frankly, I wouldn't want to piss him off. This is important for what happened next. Anyway, after the drunk tourist finally stopped trying to scratch my eyes out and "calmed down", a huge guy in a hotel entertainer uniform ran out of the same bushes she had jumped out of, clearly intending to "calm down" me too.
But to my surprise, he quickly and unexpectedly fell on the sand next to the drunk tourist. You see, my friend is afraid of dogs, but not people. This little turn of events completely scared the dogs and they ran away. After that, we didn't look for a phone - completely forgot about it, haha. We went to find the girls we were hanging out with, to tell them what happened, and then go to the hospital. Good thing I had great insurance. 2 replies
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At that moment I couldn't think straight - I was drunk, I was being bitten by dogs, I was bleeding from my arm and leg, and this drunk or stoned tourist was scratching my face... it was too much! I pushed her away, but she didn't stop - she kept screaming and scratching my face. And then, well, she had bad luck. I had a dog hanging on my left arm, and I'm right-handed, so I instinctively hit her in the face with my free hand. She instantly "calmed down" and fell on the sand.
Do I regret it? Call me an asshole, but it was her own fault. The dogs were scared by all this chaos and retreated a little - they were still barking and hanging around, but at least they didn't attack anymore. That was something.
But then something else unexpected happened.
It may seem like it all took a few minutes, but in fact it all happened incredibly fast - there was no time to think or try to calmly cope... 0 reply
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So, one dog is hanging on my arm, another has its teeth in my butt, and a third is running around trying to bite my legs. My friend is desperately trying to chase them away... Could it get any worse? Apparently so!
A tourist jumps out of the bushes about 10 meters away from us - screaming something completely unintelligible, trying to pull up her shorts, because she literally jumped out of the bushes with her bare butt! She was drunk - or more likely, high - and screaming, heading straight for me. I had no idea what she was saying, and frankly, I had other problems... the dogs still wouldn't let go.
But then she comes up to me, and I finally realize that she is screaming "Don't touch my dogs!" - as if I was the one touching them, hahaha.
And then, still screaming at me, she digs her disgusting fake nails into my face, either trying to gouge my eyes out or just scratch me to bits... 1 reply
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