Social media trend I find strange: bragging about bidets as a hallmark of civilization.

I get it, often there is subtext of formerly "thirdworld" countries (using bidets), taking revenge on Western populations (not using bidets) for looking down on them.

But suggesting your diet is so messed up the fruit of your bowels turns out messy and sticky as a common enough occurence you need a bidet strikes me as a self-own more than a gotcha.

I'm confused. Where'd you get that diet angle from? Have you ever used a bidet?

I'm messing around. I found your original reply funny, because first I thought:

"why would I write this if I never used a bidet"

Then I realised: 

"but wait... in a practical manner, one's experience using a bidet, or even complete lack of experience, is irrelevant to the point I was making in the first place"

That is to say, it's abnormal for one's anus to look like a disaster zone after passing every stool. Which by default should be solid and in one piece.

If a couple wipes of toilet paper doesn't do the trick, it suggests there's an issue at play. Feces contains a wealth of health information, and diet problems (while not exclusive) are the low hanging fruit here.

When the aforementioned social media groups launch into claims those without bidets walk around with dirty bums all day like medieval peasants, that kind of hyperbole implicitely suggests not all is well with their own digestive tract.

Bidets are fine. Some bidet lovers are silly.

A bit narrow-minded then, isn't it? I was a fan of your previous write-ups but tbh this is the stupidest thing I've read in a week