martin ↑
@martin
increasingly accepting that most of the meaning in my life will not come from work the concept was unfathomable 6 months ago
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Zach Davidson
@zd
was there a specific moment when you noticed this shift? if yes, what prompted it?
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martin ↑
@martin
it was a mix of things that’s kind of unique to my life situation but: read “Courage to be Disliked” -> realized a lot of my struggles with work were fear-related and because I was putting so much pressure on work -> talked with my fiancée and realized (some what obviously) that if X is a big part of your identity, when X goes poorly, you’ll feel disproportionately sad/upset/like a failure and will actually do X worse, spiral, etc. For me that‘s work. Realized I need more “meaning” - some people do get it from work (ie teachers, doctors) but you can also get it from being a volunteer, great relationships, super fun hobbies, etc.. So basically realized I was using the idea of "work" to fill a meaning & identity gap, mostly unsuccessfully BUT these ideas weren't 100% new so I'm not really sure what clicked this time to be honest. I think some of it is just getting older. Also I watched Frances Ha which portrays the mid-20s phase very differently and had me reflecting
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Zach Davidson
@zd
well said :) i’ve gone through similar struggles + realizations over the past few years, and it takes a lot to individually accept those things (as well as publicly share them!)
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