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Hi people, I'm Yatima and I'm also a people pleaser with problems to say no. 🫂
How do I handle it? It depends on the person I'm dealing with.
If it's my partner, the red line would be where she asks me to cut off a hand or something. 😂 😂 Just kidding, we've been together a long time and we both know where each other's no's are.
IRL I do 3D & VFX for film, tv, advertising, among other things. With my regular clients, some of them friends, I have no problems. They know that if the budget is high it's because the work is difficult. With new clients, I let the calculator make the decisions.
What I do avoid is dealing with those people you may have met along the way, who detect us and try to take advantage like parasites. 1 reply
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Yes, a really good topic, we have all faced this many times in our lives, for me it was saying no to friends. I was a photographer & video creator – way before filmmaking was in our pockets with our phones.
I would often help friends on projects. It was really hard to say no to them of course, but saying yes all the time I would have too much to do.
My biggest lesson was one time, I had to lie to a friend, because I was working for another friend – so as not to hurt feelings, you know the story. It became a much bigger drama because I just didn’t say no & I lied, so not hurt feelings.
Lesson learned: It's ok to say no sometimes, don't lie, & value your time. 🙏 1 reply
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It was great reading the replies and experiences of other
As it seems everyone at some point struggles with saying no, many have overcome this, which is promising for the rest
It's actually one of my problems as well
I've been working on it by trying to reject requests indirectly - not saying no, but giving them reasons
It works for the most part, but there are a few cases where the person who is asking you something just won't let go
For example, it's a whole different topic that needs expertise and hours of study, but they just say "go learn about it from scratch and do me this favor"
While I have a busier life than theirs, and they're offering nothing in return
In this case, I've been avoiding them, and it seems to work, but I also feel like I'm running away from my problem... 1 reply
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