heyer

@heyer

35 Following

1 Followers

heyer pfp

Scrambled eggs with tomatoes, delicious

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

I put the ‘pro’ in procrastination.

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

I need six months of vacation, twice a year

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

I’m not lazy, I’m just in energy-saving mode.

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

Why is it that the one thing I need is always at the very back of the fridge?

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

I swear my phone knows exactly when I'm on the phone with someone important and decides to die.

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

I love how my bed is a magnet for every single item I drop when I’m too lazy to get up.

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

I’m not late, I’m just on my own time zone.

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

Why is it that the one thing I need is always at the very back of the shelf?

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

I wish my wallet was as thick as my to-do list.

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

This is so frustrating, I can't even...

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

The elevator is either too full or too slow—there’s no in-between

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

If I had a dollar for every time I had to explain something twice, I’d be retired by now.

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

I wish I could invoice life for all the time it wasted.

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

My Wi-Fi has more mood swings than I do.

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it… every time.

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

I’m not lazy, I’m just on energy-saving mode

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

I came for the vibes, but now I want to leave for my bed.

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

My favorite childhood memory is not paying bills.

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

heyer pfp

Life’s too short to fold fitted sheets.

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction