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@heavygweit
i'm going to fail at putting this into words but i want to have this discussion: i have noticed that most popular philosophy focuses on detachment (stoicism, buddhism/taoism, rationality and abstract reasoning, etc) most of philosophy was generated in a time where women weren't allowed to contribute to the larger collective knowledge or participate in any educational system so my discussion/q is: if most philosophy originates from men, who historically view attachment (and therefor, emotion) as largely negative, what would philosophy be like if people more accepting of and in touch with their emotions contributed to the field of philosophy? is stoicism really a philosophy that can help you feel better, when most current research indicates that connection and community are the biggest predictors of life satisfaction? (my little research did show me that female philosophers focus on relationality, embodiment, care ethics, less abstract/universal philosophies, situated knowledge vs absolute knowledge, etc)
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@josepe-matteo
Stoicism isn’t about suppressing emotion. It’s about having control over your reactions to emotion and making honest, honorable, and logical decisions about events that occur in your life. It’s about the realization and acceptance that the only thing you have control over is your personal thoughts and actions. Everything else is beyond your control and you have nothing to do with it except your reaction to it. Sometimes the best reaction/action is nothing, because no good will come of it.
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@heavygweit
if this is true stoicism then that sounds way better than how a lot of modern philosopher people and stoic practitioners frame it! it comes across way more as "emotion bad, do not show emotion." maybe it's that the original nature of stoicism has been adopted and twisted by the alpha male culture that i've noticed way more of on twitter
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@josepe-matteo
I’m a deeply feeling Cancer. I have a plethora of emotions daily. I just control my reactions to them. If you bring it back and actually read the stoic philosophers and take the time to sit and think about what they are saying it can calm your mind and relieve anxiety. In a nutshell, accept that bad stuff happens and people are dicks. You don’t have to be, do the next right thing. That how I take the basics at least.
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@heavygweit
okay question because i think this is the point where i'm diverging/not connecting: the whole logical thing emotions aren't logical so why should we try to reason around them? recent research is showing it's better to acknowledge and process them than reason through exactly why you feel that way like, okay you know you feel that way. next time it happens, if you haven't processed those feelings and given them space, are you really going to act differently? if you've processed them, you've likely come to a subconscious acceptance and understanding of them i tried for 3 years to logic my way through emotions and then when i finally listened to my freaking smart therapist who told me to have temper tantrums and cuss when i was angry (in private lol), i started to feel a lot better (ps i am a 4x scorpio 1x aries in my main 5 so i get you on "deeply feeling" hahahaha 🥲 )
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@josepe-matteo
Your therapist gave you sound advice. You can’t avoid feelings. You’re going to have them. **Choosing** to not throw the drink at the cashier who was rude, (a negative reaction) and call him a little fucker later in your car by yourself WOULD be controlling and taking accountability for your actions. Letting it out later in private causes no harm to anyone. It takes practice and a little mental preparation to not be reactionary. I find many people walk around being angry all day and I think to myself how much it must suck to feel that way all the time. How it must affect their lives and their health. If having a release later to rid yourself of a negative emotion without harming anyone is what it takes, I’m all for it.
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