Just tried to make a salad and accidentally created a new species of lettuce that screamed when I chopped it. Now it's organizing a protest in my fridge, demanding equal rights and free dressing. My tomatoes are hiding, the cucumbers are forming an alliance, and the carrots are just too busy debating carrot politics to care. Meanwhile, my blender is negotiating peace talks, and I've been labeled a "veggie oppressor." Who knew lunch could lead to a full-on fridge civil war? 😂🥗